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Blomquist: No Joke — Let’s Take Care of the Lawyers

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blomquist-kerryA dear non-lawyer friend of mine recently gave me a joke book about lawyers.1 If you’re like me you have received such a gift before and you smile, nod your head, chuckle at the gesture, and relegate the book to being a bathroom staple until your conscience allows you to throw it away.

Inside you are thinking “Really? Changing lawyers is like changing decks on the Titanic? I hate this kind of tripe.” After all, I belong to an ancient and honorable profession. The profession of Abraham Lincoln, Thurgood Marshall, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Mahatma Gandhi, and somebody’s cousin named Vinnie. People who know less of Shakespeare than they think delight in invoking him by saying “first kill all the lawyers,” when, in actuality, the Bard’s point was that if a tyrant wants to avoid challenge or accountability, getting rid of the lawyers would be a useful strategy—making that line a shout out from the Bard himself.

Nevertheless, right now we seem to be in a historical cycle when lawyers are not generally held in high esteem, and frankly, this irritates the daylights out of me for two reasons:

1. It is undeserved. For centuries lawyers have been the champions of the liberties that protect us all, including the depraved, the guilty and the wrongfully accused. What began as the moral code of biblical times has evolved into the property issues of a post-Imperial Europe, the contracts between individuals with newfound freedoms and the protection of individuals from wrongful acts. I need not remind this audience that our good work has resulted in safer workplaces, justice for marginalized populations, cleaner food and water, and safer products for our families. Lawyers have been, and continue to be, progressives in social change.

2. This negative perception of lawyers is damaging my profession and frankly my friends and colleagues. Studies show that lawyers, when being held in public low esteem often react by holding themselves in private low esteem. And lets face it: we belong to a profession that asks people to bring us their problems, and not the easy ones at that. A typical client is often unhappy about having the problem and unhappy about having to pay a lawyer to take care of the problem. We are trained to focus on logic and set aside emotion, which may be good for detached examination of a legal issue, but it is probably not the best method for dealing with personal stress. The results are both tragic and predictable. Death by suicide among lawyers is six times that of the general population. If you don’t know of a colleague who has wrestled with substance abuse or depression, you are either in denial or a tax lawyer.2

I reached out to Loretta Oleksy, attorney and clinical case manager at the Indiana Judges & Lawyers Assistance Program (JLAP) and she captured my attention right away by noting that our adversarial system adds a dimension not found in many other professions. Let’s face it, a surgeon may be under stress while operating on a patient, but there isn’t an equally skilled surgeon in the operating room trying to kill the patient at the same time.

Loretta noted to me that JLAP certainly helps practitioners with substance abuse and depression issues but it also helps sufferers of compassion fatigue: the cumulative physical, emotional and spiritual exhaustion that results from emotionally demanding work situations. Common signs of compassion fatigue include sleep disruption, feeling overwhelmed, increased anxiety and too often adopting clients’ stress as your stress.

So now I know. In the Land of Compassion Fatigue, I am their undoubted Queen.

The good news is that Loretta also gave me some marching orders—compassion fatigue is preventable and certainly treatable:

Sleep. Really. Seven to nine hours a night.

Follow a regular exercise regimen. It’s spring. Take a walk at lunch! Hint: Exercise helps you sleep better too.

Set boundaries. We rarely do our best work at 11 p.m.

Unplug. I know this is increasingly difficult but stop sending the message that you are ALWAYS reachable. You don’t have to be.

Laugh. It is the best medicine.

Good nutrition is key but don’t go crazy. Never completely eliminate chocolate if it can be avoided because, in my opinion, it is the source of all things good.

Finally, remember, JLAP is here to help and support judges, lawyers, and law students who are dealing with all issues that affect our quality of life and/or our ability to practice law. All contact is completely confidential.

And about the lawyer jokes? I remain annoyed on behalf of the profession that brought you the mythical Denny Crane, who would undoubtedly say: “If you think lawyer jokes are funny, next time you’re in a jam, call a comedian.”•

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  1. From back in the day before secularism got a stranglehold on Hoosier jurists comes this great excerpt via Indiana federal court judge Allan Sharp, dedicated to those many Indiana government attorneys (with whom I have dealt) who count the law as a mere tool, an optional tool that is not to be used when political correctness compels a more acceptable result than merely following the path that the law directs: ALLEN SHARP, District Judge. I. In a scene following a visit by Henry VIII to the home of Sir Thomas More, playwriter Robert Bolt puts the following words into the mouths of his characters: Margaret: Father, that man's bad. MORE: There is no law against that. ROPER: There is! God's law! MORE: Then God can arrest him. ROPER: Sophistication upon sophistication! MORE: No, sheer simplicity. The law, Roper, the law. I know what's legal not what's right. And I'll stick to what's legal. ROPER: Then you set man's law above God's! MORE: No, far below; but let me draw your attention to a fact I'm not God. The currents and eddies of right and wrong, which you find such plain sailing, I can't navigate. I'm no voyager. But in the thickets of law, oh, there I'm a forester. I doubt if there's a man alive who could follow me there, thank God... ALICE: (Exasperated, pointing after Rich) While you talk, he's gone! MORE: And go he should, if he was the Devil himself, until he broke the law! ROPER: So now you'd give the Devil benefit of law! MORE: Yes. What would you do? Cut a great road through the law to get after the Devil? ROPER: I'd cut down every law in England to do that! MORE: (Roused and excited) Oh? (Advances on Roper) And when the last law was down, and the Devil turned round on you where would you hide, Roper, the laws being flat? (He leaves *1257 him) This country's planted thick with laws from coast to coast man's laws, not God's and if you cut them down and you're just the man to do it d'you really think you would stand upright in the winds that would blow then? (Quietly) Yes, I'd give the Devil benefit of law, for my own safety's sake. ROPER: I have long suspected this; this is the golden calf; the law's your god. MORE: (Wearily) Oh, Roper, you're a fool, God's my god... (Rather bitterly) But I find him rather too (Very bitterly) subtle... I don't know where he is nor what he wants. ROPER: My God wants service, to the end and unremitting; nothing else! MORE: (Dryly) Are you sure that's God! He sounds like Moloch. But indeed it may be God And whoever hunts for me, Roper, God or Devil, will find me hiding in the thickets of the law! And I'll hide my daughter with me! Not hoist her up the mainmast of your seagoing principles! They put about too nimbly! (Exit More. They all look after him). Pgs. 65-67, A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS A Play in Two Acts, Robert Bolt, Random House, New York, 1960. Linley E. Pearson, Atty. Gen. of Indiana, Indianapolis, for defendants. Childs v. Duckworth, 509 F. Supp. 1254, 1256 (N.D. Ind. 1981) aff'd, 705 F.2d 915 (7th Cir. 1983)

  2. "Meanwhile small- and mid-size firms are getting squeezed and likely will not survive unless they become a boutique firm." I've been a business attorney in small, and now mid-size firm for over 30 years, and for over 30 years legal consultants have been preaching this exact same mantra of impending doom for small and mid-sized firms -- verbatim. This claim apparently helps them gin up merger opportunities from smaller firms who become convinced that they need to become larger overnight. The claim that large corporations are interested in cost-saving and efficiency has likewise been preached for decades, and is likewise bunk. If large corporations had any real interest in saving money they wouldn't use large law firms whose rates are substantially higher than those of high-quality mid-sized firms.

  3. The family is the foundation of all human government. That is the Grand Design. Modern governments throw off this Design and make bureaucratic war against the family, as does Hollywood and cultural elitists such as third wave feminists. Since WWII we have been on a ship of fools that way, with both the elite and government and their social engineering hacks relentlessly attacking the very foundation of social order. And their success? See it in the streets of Fergusson, on the food stamp doles (mostly broken families)and in the above article. Reject the Grand Design for true social function, enter the Glorious State to manage social dysfunction. Our Brave New World will be a prison camp, and we will welcome it as the only way to manage given the anarchy without it.

  4. When I hear 'Juvenile Lawyer' I think of an attorney helping a high school aged kid through the court system for a poor decision; like smashing mailboxes. Thank you for opening up my eyes to the bigger picture of the need for juvenile attorneys. It made me sad, but also fascinated, when it was explained, in the sixth paragraph, that parents making poor decisions (such as drug abuse) can cause situations where children need legal representation and aid from a lawyer.

  5. Some in the Hoosier legal elite consider this prayer recommended by the AG seditious, not to mention the Saint who pledged loyalty to God over King and went to the axe for so doing: "Thomas More, counselor of law and statesman of integrity, merry martyr and most human of saints: Pray that, for the glory of God and in the pursuit of His justice, I may be trustworthy with confidences, keen in study, accurate in analysis, correct in conclusion, able in argument, loyal to clients, honest with all, courteous to adversaries, ever attentive to conscience. Sit with me at my desk and listen with me to my clients' tales. Read with me in my library and stand always beside me so that today I shall not, to win a point, lose my soul. Pray that my family may find in me what yours found in you: friendship and courage, cheerfulness and charity, diligence in duties, counsel in adversity, patience in pain—their good servant, and God's first. Amen."

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