Subscriber Benefit
As a subscriber you can listen to articles at work, in the car, or while you work out. Subscribe Now
Look up in the sky. What is that I see? It’s larger than life, it’s holding something in its hands and arms. Is that a book of laws under her left arm and a figure of blindfolded Justice in her right?
It’s not a bird. It’s not a plane. It is a woman, a judge, and she is here to save the day! At least that’s the expectation of those around her and the self-imposed goal she lives with everyday. Here is a day in the life of a particular female Judge.
Everyday starts with thoughts of someone else’s needs. Task 1: get the kids off to school and you to work. Between reminders and instructions that are requested then demanded just to get out the door on time, you are checking your list and checking it twice. Laptop, work phone, keys to office, feed the pets, grab your lunch and everyone out the door.
Morning routines are never routine. There was a time (a couple of years in fact) that my household consisted of extended family totaling six adults, three children and a dog. All with varying degrees of needs screaming to be fulfilled in a way that only I could, so I thought.
Work was almost an escape, until it wasn’t. The walk into the building starts the day. “Good morning, judge.” “How are you today, judge?” Is this forced conversation or an exchange of simple pleasantries? You quickly respond with a short answer so you can just keep moving.
As you approach your chambers, you hope staffs’ questions and requests can hold until the coffee is in your hand but probably not. Court call is in 10 minutes (insert text from kid #2: “my book bag is in the car can you bring it now?” Text husband to please swing by court and grab it (ignore all of his texts that are fussing and complaining about kid #2s’ lack of responsibility and why “I” let him forget it) Silence in return. Saving the day by making things OK is what I do! However, coffee has now become a must!
Finally, I put on my armor, i.e. my robe. I hear “all Rise” and my life’s desire begins anew; morning court call!
Today is going to be a good day. All attorneys are present in court on time. No defendants are disrespectful. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Case by case, called and resolved then on to the next one.
Things are going well in the tunnel until, wait, is that light or a train? The attorneys on both sides are not being courteous after admonishments. I thought only my kids fought like this!
Time for a recess to remind them how to play nice in the sandbox. Resolving conflicts by swooping in and using my super powers of gentle persuasion is what I do! However, court definitely will not end early.
What happens next is usually like throwing a wild dart at a dart board. Maybe I’ll leave for lunch alone and have a nice quiet meal. Maybe I will work through lunch at my desk. Decision made for me, there is a mandatory judges meeting during lunch.
Two hours later, my kryptonite is waiting, THE QUEUE. It is often massive enough to bring the strongest to its knees. As I approach slowly, hoping, and praying it has not grown to an insurmountable peak.
Talking to myself, “no matter how many things are in the urgent or the regular, YOU CAN DO IT! There is nothing to fear but fear itself! You’ve beat it before even though it grows back every day bigger and stronger.”
Push the button and take it down, one by one! For the next hour or so, in between my other duties with staff, THE QUEUE is defeated and wiped from the earth. This is what I do! However, who am I fooling, my secretary is just going to fill it up again.
Although it is time to go home, I can’t take my cape off yet. Processing the day, preparing for tomorrow, and then the drive home begins. Driving slowly, purposefully stopping at yellow lights and maybe detouring to the store just to walk around. Choosing to pass your favorite restaurant, with your favorite drink at the bar where everyone knows your name.
Compromise and buy dinner to take home instead of cooking. Don’t forget your superpower of memory (supported by the alarm in your cell phone to pick up kid #3 from after school athletics). This is what I do! I do it all!
Is it time to take off the cape? Is it safe to take off the cape? What happens when I drop the cape? The answer I learned through JLAP is to tell people “You can keep the cape! I don’t need it because my superpowers work without it.”
There is often a crater the size of a universe between believing you are the only one that can do it and knowing if you don’t do it someone else will.
The first super power is called delegation before destruction. It is OK to ask and allow someone else to do it.
The second super power is self-care. You cannot take care of anyone else if you fail to take care of yourself first. Think of being on an airplane, “in case of emergency, oxygen masks will drop down. Place the mask over your mouth and nose, pull the strap to tighten it. Make sure that your own mask is on first before helping your children.” This applies to every life situation.
The most important superpower is grace. Giving myself grace over the things I did not do by remembering all that I did do. Being a woman is a superpower in itself! Being a judge and a woman, well that’s just priceless!•
__________
Gina L. Jones is a Lake Superior Court judge and secretary of the Judges and Lawyers Assistance Program.
Please enable JavaScript to view this content.